Shit, it’s a long one, and he’s dragged out a weak metaphor too.

Please just take a chance on a band you don’t know. And not a band that you haven’t heard yet either, not a band that only a few of your cool kid friends talk about, not a band in the back of the NME, not a band a couple of pages into the Hype Machine popular list either. Get on Myspace, get on that old piece of shit website, and start following rabbit holes. Start with a band you like. Now find their friends, click one you don’t know, listen, PROPERLY, to a FULL song, and make your decision. Not only will this give you a greater perspective with which to evaluate all other music against, not only might it redefine your niche, not only might you find the next big/wanky thing; but more than that you’re breaking free of the… the fear, frankly, of unsigned, poorly recorded songs.

You know what, there is enough professionally recorded music that fits your little niche to keep you happy forever. I almost guarantee you that, and as you well know, even finding those guys takes a little digging, but you shouldn’t be up for this out of desperation. It’s oddly thrilling actually, not knowing how good or shit the next band will be. It’s usually fairly uplifting too. Was some of it shit? Yes. Were some of the lyrics piss-poor? Yes. Did one band make all their pictures black and white and Photoshop them into Polaroid’s to make themselves look extra-specially authentic? yes. More than once actually. But you’d be surprised to find how much of it ISN’T shit. And not because it’s perfect or revolutionary, but because the intent to make something that sounds great shines through, past the animated GIFs and spam comments for weight-loss pills disguised as one-to-one gossip. Ever noticed that?

If you are one of these artists, I hope I get round to listening to your stuff. Honestly. I hope I land on your page by accident and you re-light my optimism for the yoof as a whole. There’s SO much stuff out there, and rather than seeing yourself as a drop in that ocean, you’ve got to look at yourself as a drop in a stream. Yes that stream inevitably lead to an ocean, but someone’s going to get their feet wet soon enough. And on the other end, you, the listener, (though they’re not mutually exclusive positions) need to stop seeing yourself as a consumer and music as a product to be sold. These days, if you want it it’s free. I mean shit, on myspace it’s free at the very least. No excuse for thriftiness holds in the AGCS court. Fucking dip your toes in. Be brave. You’ll find warmth and soulfulness and scenesters and a really annoying slow flash player that WILL NOT START EVEN THOUGH I CLICKED PLAY LOADS. Keep going. Everyone you’ve never heard of is waiting for someone to land on their page. They want you there and you’re not too good for them. To conclude my water metaphor in the only cheesy way I know how, I ask you to throw on a swimsuit or speedo, if you like speedo’s, (they’re only metaphorical after all, and they make your package look bigger.) and get wet, get soaking. Like your mum last night. HIYOOOOO. No seriously, do it now. Myspace.com. Trust me.

Alistair